Emotional Intelligence is not enough: develop your Values Intelligence
Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends — honesty and hard work, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism — these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history.
What is demanded, then, is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility — a recognition on the part of every American that we have duties to ourselves, our nation and the world; duties that we do not grudgingly accept, but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character than giving our all to a difficult task.
Excerpt from Barack Obama’s inaugural speech on 20 January 2009
On the day the 44th President of the United States of America Barack Obama was inaugurated, the world was in crisis, an economic crisis, but also a crisis of principles and values. Therefore, he considered it important to promote in his inauguration speech a return to those old principles and values as an engine to face the new challenges of this world.
In recent years we have become aware that we need to develop our emotional intelligence, which is good, because training our emotional intelligence involves improving the following aspects: the ability to motivate ourselves, to persevere in spite of possible frustrations, to control impulses, to defer gratification, to regulate our own moods, to prevent distress from interfering with our rational faculties, and the ability to empathise and trust others.
However, thinking about the people who inspire me (to name a few: Marcus Aurelius, Florence Nightingale, Gandhi, Teresa of Calcutta, Martin Luther King, Rosa Parks, Nelson Mandela or Malala Yousafzai) I believe that for them there has been something more important than the management of their emotions, I believe that what has really given them strength and defined their goals to fight for have always been their principles and values.
Therefore, I believe that cultivating our emotional intelligence is not enough, but that it must be complemented with the development of a Values Intelligence, which we could define as:
Values Intelligence is the set of abilities and skills of individuals to recognise, understand, manage and modify their own and others’ values in order to pursue individual and common goals.
In other words, the development of our Values Intelligence will consist of building an adequate set of values to direct our lives based on them, and to establish relationships between individuals and groups of individuals or organisations to pursue individual or common goals based on these values.
Note: The concept of Values Intelligence has been mentioned before by other authors with a different approach than mine. I attach an example reference in case it is of interest: Values Intelligence.
Why should we develop our Values Intelligence?
We need to develop it for a number of reasons:
To cultivate values that shape our character and that of the society in which we live. We cannot navigate without a compass, without knowing what is right and what is wrong, we need a set of values to guide the individual in his or her desire for self-realisation, and to serve humanity in its aspirations for peace and brotherhood.
To have the tools that will enable us to be happier and to cope better with life’s difficulties. True happiness comes from identifying and cultivating our values and using them on a daily basis in work, love, leisure and raising our children. Cultivating our values increases our level of “resilience” and therefore enables us to cope better with adversity.
To be able to grow as free people. The person who has values is much freer than the one who does not have them, is able, for example, not to eat something that does not suit him, even if he feels like it, or to work when he is tired, or not to get angry over a trifle.
To provide us with energy in our daily activities. “Values are the energy that will allow you to successfully face your goals” (Virgil).
To define our goals, and ultimately to better direct our lives. The choice of your missions and objectives, which will ultimately shape the meaning of your life, will depend very much on your principles and values.
The development of Values Intelligence will consist of cultivating a set of values that shape our character and help us to define and achieve our individual goals, or common goals with other people or organisations.
What are the values that our Values Intelligence should include?
I believe that the values to be cultivated are universal for all human beings, therefore we should all cultivate the same values. Martin E. P. Seligman, in his book “Authentic Happiness”, points out that although traditionally the different branches of science, such as psychology, have not given principles and values the importance they should, religion and philosophy have dealt with people’s principles and values for millennia and there is a surprising convergence between different traditions such as Confucius, Aristotle, St. Thomas Aquinas, the Bushido code of the Samurai or the Hindu Bhagavad-Gita. According to Seligman, all these traditions include six sets of key strengths or virtues that should be cultivated by human beings:
Wisdom. Wisdom is a capacity of human beings, which enables them to make fair and perfectly balanced decisions based on discernment between truth and falsehood, and between right and wrong. Wisdom is cultivated by those who have a love of knowledge, face reality with an open mind without prejudice, learn from what happens to them, have creative thinking, question the why of things, like to communicate with others, see themselves from a certain distance and have an overview of the world. An example of people who pursued wisdom were the Stoic philosophers, my favourite branch of philosophy as it has a direct application in our lives.
Courage. Courageous people are those who do not shrink from threats, challenges, pain or difficulties. Courage helps us to face fears such as suffering or change by overcoming the emotional elements of these fears; courage is often associated with virtues such as bravery, perseverance and integrity. An example of courage, perseverance and integrity was demonstrated by Gandhi in defending the rights of millions of Hindus.
Love. Love is considered as a set of behaviours and attitudes, unconditional and selfless, that are manifested between beings capable of developing emotional intelligence. Love is cultivated by those who practice kindness and generosity, who love and allow themselves to be loved. An example of a person who practised love was Mother Teresa of Calcutta who shared her life on the streets of Calcutta with the poorest, the sick and the hungry.
Justice. Justice was born out of the need to maintain harmony among the members of a society. It is the set of guidelines and criteria that establish an appropriate framework for relationships between people and institutions, authorising, prohibiting and permitting specific actions in their interaction. An example of a request for justice was demonstrated by Rosa Parks, who on 1 December 1955 refused to obey the driver of a public bus in Montgomery, Alabama, who wanted to force her to give up her seat to a white person and move to the back of the bus as the law of the time in the southern United States dictated.
Temperance. Temperance is the virtue that recommends moderation in the attraction of pleasures and seeks balance in the use of created goods. It ensures the mastery of the will over the instincts and keeps desires within the bounds of honesty. In a broader sense, scholars define it as synonymous with moderation, sobriety and continence. An example of temperance is shown by Nelson Mandela who, after being elected president of South Africa, was able to create a country where everyone could live together by banishing the enmity between blacks and whites.
Transcendence. Transcendence, which in religious terms is known as “spirituality”, comprises the capacities that allow us to go beyond ourselves and connect with something higher, with other people, with the future, with evolution, the divine or the universe. An example of transcendence could be Marcus Aurelius for all the teachings he bequeathed to future generations, particularly through his work Meditations.
The development of our Values Intelligence would involve cultivating the following values common to all humanity: wisdom, courage, love, justice, temperance and transcendence.
How can we develop our Values Intelligence?
Just as we can empower our body through physical training, we can also develop our Values Intelligence by practising good habits. We can define our habits as a series of patterns that we repeat constantly and daily, often unconsciously, that express our character and generate our effectiveness… or ineffectiveness. Human beings are creatures of habit; in fact, some psychologists maintain that more than 90% of our behaviour is formed by our habits. The moment we decide to perform certain acts in a more effective way than we usually do, we will be modifying our habits, the modification of our habits will cause us to reinforce the universal values that we must cultivate, the cultivation of these values will develop our Values Intelligence.
Once you develop your value intelligence, apply it in your relationships with others — the more universal values we share, the easier it will be to define common goals and work together to achieve them.
Here are some examples of such habits that we can create to help us cultivate our principles and values and therefore develop our Values Intelligence:
To enhance wisdom:
Try to see things from an overall perspective, taking into account different parts or points of view rather than concentrating on a partial view. Only from an overview will you have a view of the issues as a whole and be able to make wise decisions. When faced with a problem, keep an open mind to find unconventional solutions.
You can draw up a list of topics that interest you and devote time to them: learn Spanish, sign up for a creative writing course or study Stoic philosophy. If you are passionate about a particular topic, you can share your knowledge with others: join a cultural association, join a Facebook group, etc.
You can filter out stereotypical or biased messages from society in general and the media in particular and try to form your own opinions. You should select reliable means of accessing information. If you find false information you can report it for the benefit of your fellow human beings.
To enhance courage (which includes bravery, perseverance and integrity):
Decide to face the problems that arise instead of trying to avoid them. In some cases these problems will bring pain, but this will be a pain we learn from — there is nothing worse than being afraid of pain rather than facing it. You can also see problems as opportunities for improvement.
Detect practices with which you do not agree (injustices, discrimination, corrupt behaviour, etc.) and confront them.
Train willpower and perseverance, these are virtues necessary for courage and every day offers you opportunities for this, for example:
- If you spend the first day of the week doing the most unpleasant part of the job, then you will have the rest of the week to do the jobs you enjoy the most. Work as much as you need to during the week to free up the weekend for leisure activities that interest you. Study hard during the course so that you can have a well-deserved holiday afterwards. It is more satisfying to do the hard work first and get the prize at the end than to enjoy it now and pay for it later, but it requires discipline that must be cultivated.
- Take care of your health by doing frequent physical exercise and adopting good eating habits.
- Make a list of the important things you are putting off and write down a plan to accomplish each of them.
- Finish what you start, don’t give up in the face of difficulties you encounter.
- Make your mood depend on you, not on external elements. If you are one of those who are happy when the weather is good and sad when the weather is bad, train your character to be happy regardless of the weather, if the weather is bad, smile. The bird does not sing because it is happy, it is happy because it sings.
Practice integrity, act according to your thoughts. Detect when you are forced to tell lies and think how you can act in another way that does not force you to deceive others.
To enhance love:
Accept that all people are different and all deserve respect. Learn to recognise each person’s differences, to value them and to communicate with each person according to their communication style.
Do you voluntarily help your neighbours or co-workers? Now is the time to do so. Identify some things you do or know that can be helpful to others and let them know.
Collaborate with your co-workers instead of competing against them. Teamwork helps to find areas of collaboration, sign up for projects where you can work as a team.
Join a social activity to help others.
Keep in mind that it is just as important to love as it is to let yourself be loved, do not put up barriers to the manifestations of love towards you and accept them.
To enhance Justice:
Try to reward people for the work they do, not for how well you like them.
In group work, make sure that everyone does their part.
Don’t allow yourself or others to be taken advantage of, be assertive with people who commit these unfair acts to stop them.
Treat others as you would like to be treated yourself.
To enhance temperance:
Expose yourself to situations where you can practice self-control. For example, try interacting with people you don’t get along with and try to transform those negative emotions into positive ones. Perhaps you will improve those relationships or at worst you will at least have practised controlling your emotions.
Don’t get too happy about successes and don’t get too sad about failures. We are in this world to enjoy and learn, not to let emotions rule us.
Postpone satisfaction and focus on long-term rather than short-term goals.
Identify something that bothers you and expose yourself to it to observe your anger and try to control it.
To enhance transcendence:
Enjoy everything that moves you: nature, music, painting, etc.
Appreciate and value everything you have. Try to always see the good side of things. Show gratitude towards people. Forgive offences against you.
Identify your goals or purposes in life and pursue them. Be fully involved in the things you do.
Look for purpose or meaning in everything that happens in your life.
Conclusions
In this article I have argued that the cultivation of Emotional Intelligence must be complemented with the development of Values Intelligence . This will be useful for: shaping our character and that of the society in which we live, having tools that will allow us to be happier and better cope with life’s difficulties, growing as freer people, providing us with energy in our daily activities and helping us to define the right objectives.
The development of our Values Intelligence would involve the cultivation of values common to all humanity: wisdom, courage, love, justice, temperance and transcendence. Once you develop your value intelligence, apply it in your relationships with others. The more universal values we share, the easier it will be to define common goals and work together to achieve them.
The way to develop our Values Intelligence would be to practice good habits, examples of which are provided in the article.
Click here if you want to access the Spanish version of this article
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© Virgilio Postigo Cubo. August 2021.
This article has been inspired by my book “Dirige tu vida” (Direct your life), only available in spanish. You can find below the link to this book and others I have published on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.es/Virgilio-Postigo-Cubo/e/B08LBXHMVG
I also attach the website of my book “Nico, the little detective” in case it is of interest:
https://nicodetective.com/
